It’s time for a new futon. My current futon is not only lumpy, but the couch frame is literally held together by four uneven stacks of books and the wall. To be honest, the futon has been in a sorry state for well over a year. Of course, twelve months ago, it was only propped up by two stacks of books. It also didn’t need the wall for stability. But as our sole piece of furniture, it had a lot of use, increasingly losing bits and pieces through the year. A nut and screw one day, a random spring the next, an entire bracer bar a few months later… And yet, we didn’t replace it until now for varying reasons—most of which are directly related to my writerly income (or lack thereof). But now that I have a little money these days—well—it’s time to replace the futon.

To add to the urgency of replacing my futon, I have a houseguest coming this Friday. Of course, I’m too embarrassed to let said houseguest sleep on this lumpy “bookton” we currently have. But the manflesh’s parents and our friends—they’ve slept on this very off-kilter futon many times over. Strange, I know. I won’t even pretend to have a reason for you.

We could easily buy a new $50 metal frame to replace the former $50 metal frame. The last one—bless it’s cottony soul—was cheap and sturdy enough for a year or more, making it an excellent choice for us while we were college students. But I’ve recently discovered that once you graduate college, you suddenly have more discerning taste. With that diploma, you may not get a paycheck, but you certainly get a sense of entitlement to quality furnishing. The manflesh and I mutually decided that we want a nicer, more sturdy futon this time&#8212one that will hopefully last much longer than three years. Consequently, I have dedicated what feels like a small fortune for obtaining the newest member of our household. All I know is that for over $200, this frame better out-last my immortal dog.


  1. A bookton is a pretty darn good thing for a bookworm to sleep on.